“This is a true saying . . . If a man desire the office (position) of a bishop (an Elder, leadership), he desireth a good work. For a bishop must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior . . . . One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity (honour and honesty) . . .
For if a man know not how to rule (to stand before, preside over, maintain) his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God ?” I Timothy 3:1-13
“The home (and the church) is an institution of God . . . God designed that the family circle, father, mother, and children, should exist in this world as a firm (a security, reliable and trustworthy, stable). The father is to act as priest in his own house (interceding, standing in place of his family). He is the “house-band'” and what his influence will be in the home will be determined by his knowledge of the Only True God and Jesus Christ Whom He has sent . . .
Woman should fill the position which God originally designed for her, as her husband’s equal. The world needs mothers who are mothers not merely in name but in every sense of the word. We may safely say that the distinctive duties of woman are more sacred, more holy, than those of man. Let woman realize the sacredness of her work and in the strength and fear of God take up her life mission. Let her educate her children for usefulness in this world and for a home in the better world !
The father is to stand at the head of his family, not as an overgrown, undisciplined boy, but as a man with a manly character and with his passions controlled. He is to obtain an education in correct morals. His conduct in his home life is to be directed and restrained by the pure principles of the Word of God. Then he will grow up to the full stature of a man in Christ Jesus !
The Head of the Family Firm. — The husband and father is the head of the household. The wife looks to him for love and sympathy and for aid in the training of the children; and this is right. The children are his as well as hers, and he is equally interested in their welfare. The children look to the father for support and guidance; he needs to have a right conception of life and of the influences and associations that should surround his family; above all, he should be controlled by the love and fear of God and by the teaching of His Word, that he may guide the feet of his children in the right way. . . . ref: Deuteronomy 5:1-33, 6:1-21 & 11:13-19 & Malachi 4:1-6 & Ephesians 6:4
The father should do his part toward making home happy. Whatever his cares and business perplexities, they should not be permitted to overshadow his family; he should enter his home with smiles and pleasant words . . .
The Lawmaker and Priest.–All members of the family center in the father. He is the lawmaker, illustrating in his own manly bearing the sterner virtues: energy, integrity, honesty, patience, courage, diligence, and practical usefulness. The father is in one sense the priest of the household, laying upon the altar of God the morning and evening sacrifice (worship, praise and prayer). The wife and children should be encouraged to unite in this offering and also to engage in the song of praise. Morning and evening the father, as priest of the household, should confess to God the sins committed by himself and his children through the day. ref: Job 1:1-5
Those sins which have come to his knowledge and also those which are secret, of which God’s eye alone has taken cognizance, should be confessed. This rule of action, zealously carried out by the father when he is present or by the mother when he is absent, will result in blessings to the family . . . . ref: Deuteronomy 11:21-28
The father represents the Divine Lawgiver in his family (I Corinthians 11:2-12). He is a laborer together with God, carrying out the gracious designs of God and establishing in his children upright principles, enabling them to form pure and virtuous characters, because he has preoccupied the soul with that which will enable his children to render obedience not only to their earthly parent but also to their Heavenly Father . . . .
The wife and mother should not sacrifice her strength and allow her powers to lie dormant, leaning wholly upon her husband. Her individuality cannot be merged in his. She should feel that she is her husband’s equal— to stand by his side, she faithful at her post of duty and he at his. Her work in the education of her children is in every respect as elevating and ennobling as any post of duty he may be called to fill, even if it is to be the chief magistrate of the nation.
The Queen of the Home.–The king upon his throne has no higher work than has the mother. The mother is queen of her household. She has in her power the molding of her children’s characters, that they may be fitted for the higher, immortal life. An angel could not ask for a higher mission; for in doing this work she is doing service for God. Let her only realize the high character of her task, and it will inspire her with courage. Let her realize the worth of her work and put on the whole armor of God, that she may resist the temptation to conform to the world’s standard. Her work is for time and for eternity.
The mother is the queen of the home, and the children are her subjects. She is to rule her household wisely, in the dignity of her motherhood. Her influence in the home is to be paramount; her word, law. If she is a Christian, under God’s control, she will command the respect of her children. The children are to be taught to regard their mother, not as a slave whose work it is to wait on them, but as a queen who is to guide and direct them, teaching them line upon line, precept upon precept.. . . !”
– Adventist Home, p.211-247
and ref: 10 Manuscript Releases, p.188
Please click HERE for entire manuscript as – Adventist Home PDF.